Since time immemorial the Hiking Club has made the annual pilgrimage to the Lakeland village of Braithwaite for its first weekend trip. The origins of this never-changing ritual are lost in the mists of which they get a lot in the north Lake District. So cue much wailing and gnashing of teeth as a proclamation is nailed to the gear-store door, stating that this year’s first weekend will be a whole 10km east of Braithwaite, in the village of Threlkeld. We know not what lies in this hitherto uncharted territory. All we can say is that you ought to bring a pair of sturdy walking boots and a good packed lunch and we can only hope that we haven’t opened a Pandora’s box creating a schism between Braithwaitists and Threlkeldians. All this will be happening to the accompaniment of Prokofiev’s ‘The Montagues and Capulets’ (the theme from The Apprentice).